When you’re about to have sex with someone in person, do you dive right into it? Some couples do have passion where they just can’t wait. But, we’ll bet that you, like most people, need some warming up before taking the plunge. It catapults the pleasure into new realms when you throw built-up tension, teasing, and a minor element of frustration into the mix. It makes the act of actual sex that much more cathartic. Phone sex operates in the same way. Because phone sex isn’t necessarily portrayed much in movies and TV, porn, and media, people don’t have all the tools to know how to do it correctly. There’s not much to reference to! So, when we see it on TV, we think that’s how it should be done. But, when it is portrayed to us in a film or movie, rarely is foreplay part of the equation for the simple purpose of saving time. And, on that note, rarely (if ever) do movies and TV shows have time to demonstrate what to do after the phone sex is over! If you are in a relationship, this is extremely important. If you are guilty like so many others and need some direction while navigating the world of phone sex foreplay and phone sex aftercare, read the rest of this article for a mini master class!
Foreplay:
When thinking about phone sex foreplay, you’ll want to consider the things you’d do if it were the real deal. When you are preparing your partner or getting him/her in the mood to have sex, what is it that you’d usually do or say? Foreplay is so important! Do you gently kiss their neck, whisper sexy talk into their ear, or graze their thigh? Break these very first moves down step by step and describe them in great detail. At the end of the day, this is all it comes down to. Because you are using the phone as a means of communication rather than actual touch, you’ll want to be as descriptive as humanly possible. What do you expect to taste, feel, smell, and hear? Additionally, because phone says leans into fantasy but also requires some real-time masturbatory work, you’ll want to wave in and out of reality while you are describing this. What we mean is that, occasionally, while you are describing to your partner what you’d do to them if they were there in the flesh, talk about what you are actually doing to yourself in the flesh! You can move from kissing their neck to telling them that you’re squirting lube onto yourself. It’s some advanced, epic storytelling! Tease them with your words.
Aftercare:
Phone sex can be confusing an embarrassing for people sometimes, especially people who are new to it. So, in order to maintain a healthy relationship with your partner, you need to make sure they are comfortable after the fact. This is the aftercare. All it requires is a little complimenting, checking in, and talking about the experience. It’s the pillow talk of phone sex. The combination of these three elements will also make certain that your phone sex skills with each other will improve as you move into the future with each other. Complimenting your partner will give them confidence and make your experience better. While you should highlight their strengths, you don’t need to be phony. It’s ok to laugh and reminisce on some awkward moments within the call. It’s about acknowledging the experience and making each other feel comfortable enough to try again!
[Related: How to Act When Calling a Phone Sex Operator For the First Time]