When it comes to sexual fantasies, many people tend to bury their deepest desires in a tiny lockbox in their brain, only to be opened when they are in a very intimate space. The idea that people may share these fantasies might scare the pants off of these kinds of people (and not in a good way). And, while everyone is entitled to keeping their secrets hush hush, several studies suggest that talking about those fantasies out in the open might be incredibly beneficial to your health. In addition, discussing your sexual fantasies out loud can lead to a much more fun and explosive sex life. The people who engage in conversation are said to have a very wide range of sexual activities that they have explored and additionally are much more comfortable with self-pleasure. It’s important to know that a healthy relationship with self-pleasure and fantasies are key in acceptance and love for the self. More than that, holding something in or failing to honestly voice an opinion contributes largely to psychosomatic stress, which detriments the immune system. Many psychologists and societal studies suggest and show that open sexual communication is better for your overall health. If this is in fact the case, why are people so afraid to discuss their sexual fantasies?
[RELATED: Best free phone sex lines]
According to the language by which our common society follows, the word fantasy is connected to words such as secret, delusion, and taboo. Though not collectively synonymous, the connection between those ideas lends itself to a belief that a fantasy is something that might prove inappropriate or embarrassing to share. Coupling that with anything sexual is going to make a lot of people run for the hills. There is also the, “what’s your wildest fantasy, baby?” cultural phenomenon. You’ve heard it asked in movies, tv shows, and music. Often, it’s by a seductress to an aroused man. It begs the question, what is our wildest fantasy? Truthfully, when people fantasize, their secret desires aren’t all that wild or crazy! In fact, it’s usually tame, sometimes to a disappointing degree. In the rarest of cases, it’s horrible, sociopathic, or illegal. And again, it’s profoundly rare. Take the popular 1999 Ludacris song titled Fantasy. Ludacris, who is a notoriously raunchy rapper, goes into his potential fantasies. Here are some of his ‘wildest’ fantasies according to his own song:
- I wanna get you in the bathtub / With the candles lit you give it up till they go out
- Or we can do it on stage of the Ludacris concert / ‘Cause you know I got sold out
- In the DJ booth or in the back of the V.I.P./ Whipped cream with cherries and strawberries on top, lick it don’t stop
- We can do it in the White House / Try to make them turn the lights out
Most of his fantasies have to do with having sex in public places or licking food off of a woman. Perhaps the ‘wildest’ example here is that he’d like to have sex with a woman on stage. We’re not sure many people would want to watch that, but at the end of the day, it’s not as ‘wild’ as we might think. Granted, Ludacris is only one person, but he speaks to the fact that most people don’t have horrific fantasies that they’d be ostracized for discussing. Upon some research, we have found some of the most common fantasies: Domination, BDSM, threesomes, public sex, role-playing, unique positions, and voyeurism. Pretty tame, right? If you’re reading this list and thinking, “my fantasies are much crazier than those,” that is ok too! Whatever your fantasy, as long as it involves consensual sex between adults, you should explore it! We can almost guarantee that you’re not alone in your fantasy. And, chances are there is a lot of porn and chatrooms on the web dedicated to your crazy kink.
Considering the fact that openly discussing sexual fantasy is important to mental health, along with the notion that you are probably not as kinky as you think you are, it seems like a no-brainer to discuss these things openly in society! We can, however, appreciate that it is difficult to express those thoughts to others. If you have a friend or partner who you can discuss your fantasy with, we encourage you to try. If not, we’d suggest phone sex! Phone sex not only allows you to discuss your fantasy, but it is a space in which you can also explore that fantasy with another, non-judgemental person. It’s a perfect way to get some of these thoughts out into the open air and give yourself a release. The phone sex operators are people who have heard it all, trust us. So, go ahead. Have some fun, it’s doctor recommended!